Moving from academic writing to readable writing is a trip! Over the past many years, writing for the privileged few meant that those I really wanted to hear were excluded. Now my blog is writing my feelings, what I want you to hear. Thanks to all you great bloggers out there.
Parenting is LOVE
But let me get to parenting, that everyday, full time , no ease-up job.
“When he gets to 5 years old…….yeah…I can take my first breath. Ha Ha”
When she gets to 9 maybe…NO! as there is no cut off point. Not if we have any relationship with our children. In a recent article looking at best sellers in the character-building market I find that the 3-9 year old girl needs her father as much as the boy needs him. The boy turns to him for role modelling. She turns to him for testing out behaviours.
In each case the relationship is invaluable in the building of a sense of external self. As you love your preschooler and help in the formation of self-confidence and self-esteem, to love your tweens becomes automatic.
So it is with LOVE that we parent
Love your tweens and preschoolers
We have to show our tweens and preschoolers love even when we are feeling extreme anger and disappointment at their behavior. It almost seems that we don’t love them. Stick to your guns. Your fall from perfection was just a reminder to you that you do love your child. Hence the extreme reaction. It might be a little extreme as you do what you saw your parent do. Don’t worry because you are now learning new forms of discipline that they didn’t have. New ways to love your tweens and preschoolers.
If you stick to what you ask for with no lowering of what you see and know as right, they will love you in the long run. Children need to be faced with someone who does not change. Whether it is Mom, Dad, grandparent, Aunt. Whoever. These people just expect one thing from the child no matter what is happening.
Unconditional love is NOT being the child’s best friend. It’s not saying that’s cool even when you know it is not. It’s showing that you are there no matter what happens. It’s sharing that what you are doing or expecting is coming from a p lace of wanting only what’s best for them. She or he can always trust you not to shame them in public or leave them in a totally precarious position. Especially for tweens and preschooler’s, trust is so crucial as they do fall off the bicycle or they have to move to a new school and make new friends again, or ….
Experiencing how to love your tween and preschooler has two sides. There is theirs and there is yours. Don’t fall in the trap.
From your side– Love that recognizes the traps out there waiting for your tweens and preschoolers to fall in. Love that gives them another chance. Love that says that in spite of your difference in size or physical abilities or some other difference, they are cool in your sight.
Music is always important to tweens. The lyrics make a big difference.
Peace and Love lyah,
Love Iyah, Love Iyah
Just a little love Iyah
My brother says Love lyah
My sister says Love lyahThis life is not for the weak but for those whose hearts are strong
Hatred begets evil but with love you can’t go wrong no I say
Love lyah, Love Iyah, Oh I say Love Iyah
All the people say Love lyah, Love Iyah, oh Love lyah
Come on children Love Iyah
Glory Train Love IyahThey will rise in arms against you in the name of the lawmakers
And turn your brother against you and make wrong the good you’ve done
But I say
Love lyah, Love lyah
My brother says Love lyah
My sister says Love Iyah
And I say Love Iyah, Love Iyah
Peace and Love lyah, Love lyahThey will try to buy your souls with money,
Bribing with milk and honey
Distorting the youths in their minds
Doping the wool they pull over their eyes
Is just another Love lyah, Love Iyah
My brother says Love Iyah
My sister says Love lyah
Ail the people say Love lyah, Love lyah
I and I say Love Iyah
Even the babe Love lyahJah call on the youth cause they’re strong
Don’t give your strength in vain now
Seek ye first the Kingdom all good things shall be added
here I say Love your enemies
Bless all those who curse you
Do good to them that hate you a tell you
Pray for those that oppress you
And tell them is one Love Iyah
Peace and Love Iyah
My brother say
Love lyah
source: http://www.lyricsondemand.com/r/ritamarleylyrics/loveiyahlyrics.html