There are so many other things to talk about. How old are preschoolers? 3 ½ to 6 years old or so. Why choose to talk about race? For preschoolers, this is the time for learning who they are. For parents and caregivers, kids are learning that words are so important. So, for example, there are so many positives when you described Jennifer as “a 5 year old beautiful, sometimes funny (amusing) little girl who loves to say Tiny Miss Trumble is my favorite teacher”. Whoever is making ‘race’ important is outside of the internal circle. Besides, the child only understands what is important when YOU tell her or him.
So you want to talk about race? Well, race is an area which includes the color of a person’s skin. And each country has a different idea of what is dark or light, olive or black, clear or brown. Have you noticed how we talk about skin whiteners from China to Jamaica. Clearly skin color is a relative thing. Talking about race seems somewhat limiting especially for the preschooler.
I can remember, there was this family. Mom was caucasian and Dad was brown. Suppose I said Mom was white and Dad was brown. Or Mom was from Poland and Dad was from Northern India. What would you think? In fact, Northern India’s original peoples were much lighter in skin tone than South Eastern natives. Now what do you think?
It’s too general!
I have a feeling it’s just all too general to talk about skin color. I was telling you about this family where the parents looked totally different in skin color and the 2 girls were born exactly the same way. They all called themselves by their nationality not skin color. Why? Because for them, it would be too insulting to the family to use labels.
Between 4 and 6 yrs of age, feelings of self worth develop in the child. These feelings of how good you are and why, how important you are and why, who loves you and why are formed from the interaction the child has with those around them.
Think about this. You must value and respect yourself first before you can love anyone else. Their experience tells them who they are and this is reinforced by parent/caregivers or nullified by parents/caregivers.
Which end of the stick do you want to be?
That’s why I say, why talk with your preschooler about race? It really doesn’t bother them until you the adult tells them it’s something to worry about. Tell them let’s talk about it. So you can say something like, “Is my skin darker than yours? I wonder how this happened? Sometimes people in the same family have different skin colors”.
Books for children have lots of pictures. Talk about who looks like me. Do they wear different clothes? Comment ..I wonder why this is so? Let’s talk about these types of things.
Using books and pictures quickly becomes interesting, knowledge-building, and lots of fun. All the research, studies, parents and caregivers agree that the self will grow quickly, positively in this atmosphere. Most importantly, you are now developing the framework which leaves a positive sense of self to flourish in both you and the child.